What we're hearing
You are weighing whether the cost of continuing still makes sense for your family.
The decision may feel disloyal
You may worry that asking whether to stop sounds like giving up on your child or criticizing people who have tried to help.
The family is paying real costs now
Time, transportation, missed work, emotional energy, siblings’ schedules, and life at home all belong in the decision.
Reassurance is not enough information
You need to understand what has changed, what has not, and what each available path would realistically require next.
This decision deserves full information — and you can say the doubt out loud without penalty.
Pick one thing for today
One. Not a list.
Your path forward
What to bring up
Say the question directly: “I am considering stopping, and I need a full-information conversation rather than reassurance.” A dedicated meeting gives the team time to prepare data and prevents the decision from being squeezed into a session handoff.
Bring the family cost alongside the clinical picture. If services are helping one area while making work, sleep, transportation, or family life unsustainable, both sides of that equation belong in the conversation.
What kind of help to ask for
Ask for a plain-language progress review that separates meaningful gains, unchanged goals, new concerns, and skills that have not carried into home life. Ask what evidence supports continuing the current approach rather than simply continuing services in general.
Ask what options exist between “continue exactly as-is” and “stop immediately.” That may include a revised schedule, different priorities, a transition plan, or another referral, but the team should explain what is actually available for your situation.
What usually changes, and how fast
The data review and options conversation can be scheduled promptly. A responsible transition, major program revision, or coordination with another provider may take longer than the decision itself.
You do not have to decide during the meeting. Leave with the information, the available options, and a date when you will answer. A decision made after reflection is still a timely decision.
Where to go next on this site
Open the “I do not see progress” outcome when the central question is whether the reported gains match what your family actually experiences.
Open What Is ABA when the decision is difficult because nobody has clearly explained what the current goals are supposed to accomplish.
Questions for your BCBA
Pick two. Five questions asked is none asked.
Take it with you
Type into it on your phone or computer and save it there, or print it. It stays on your device — this site never sees it.